All - Feedback on Latest Rough Cut

For our latest rough cut we got the following feedback:

• Remove all the shots that contain houses. We have managed to cut these shots out by rotating and panning into the shots,
• Remove all explicits although the "Bleeps" need to be added to add to the humour of the music video,
• A possibility to link the first shot into the second of the introduction is to fade the moon into Conor's face. Also extend the transition and zoom into the moon,
• The diegetic introduction is too long and needs to be reduced. At the time of receiving these notes it was around 36 seconds however now we have managed to reduce this element to by reducing clips that go on for too long,
• The need to use more transitions that fade ins/outs. An example of this is trying a four shot split screen of each band member picking up his own instrument. When we tried this we felt it didn't suit the genre of our music video,
• There is a need for more close-ups of Sam, especially in the intro of the song. There is also a need to reduce the amount of group shots incorporated,
• Earthquake transitions on close-ups of guitars,
• Bring the narration soon earlier,
• During the chorus focus more on Mitch instead of the rest of the band,
• Include artificial zooms,
• Include more multilayering at specific times (particularly in darker areas and skyline in lighter areas),
• The claw shots are too quick. There is a need to give the audience the chance to establish what is happening. Also need to cross-cut between the chase and performance aspects,
• A need to think about the song and certain aspects and reflect it in our editing,
• Slow down footage to produce a slow mo effect if there is not enough gore,
• Remove any awkward shots i.e. A shot of Sam where he stops moving to remove some of the fake intestines,
• The narrative aspect needs more sense of a creature lurking on the more. Also the possibility of creating a false scare,
• Shots of the moon incorporated into other shots in the narrative gives more sense of a creature,
• Re-dub Conor's lines "Guys Im going for a piss" to something similar to "I'm going to be one at nature" adds to the humour also have a diegect zip,
• Slashing noise followed by a shot of blood rushing down.
• There needs to be more shots of the creature to anchor what it is,
• Also a need for more close-ups and extreme close-ups of Sam,
• A possibility of red liquid being spat out. However in our first shoot we did try to create this with red blood capsules it didn't work but we could try and use a different substance in the form of a liquid,
• The narrative aspect needs to be more dynamic also needs to come in earlier,
• To add further humour to the music video we could include a portable barbecue which intestines are thrown onto. Later on in the music video a band member could eat these. The video also needs more gore and
• Another possibility to colour saturate the snow in where Mitch and James fall over to red, signifying the two slipping on blood rather than snow.